An open letter to the male feminists - Dealing with the Death of a spouse - Discussion Forum

Male Feminists! – Does it sound like an oxymoron? How can males be feminists, especially when women fighting for women have accorded luxuriously demeaning and fancily derogatory tittles to men like “Male Chauvinist Pigs (MCP)”?

Well, there lies the catch. Most men, being victims of the “Looking Good Syndrome (LGS)” felt ashamed being called an MCP and that too by a woman – because for these so termed MCPs a woman is worse than a kid when it comes to being harassed. They can imagine almost any level of atrocity on the woman. And when the same women call these presumably and perceptively “Strong Men” as MCPs, it hurts their false ego and they become “Male Feminists” – put in other words as “Self-proclaimed Protectors of Women”.

In recent times, we had quite a few well known people falling victim to this vicious trap of the intra-war between Male-Ego and the Looking Good Syndrome as mentioned below,

Boman Irani rings the bell Sachin bats for women Sajid Khan calls all men as ‘cheaters’ Sehwag protects women from ‘eve-teasers’ While Boman and Sajid belong to the Bollywood industry, Sachin and Sehwag are cricketers. And all*of them are talking as if they are completely unaware of victimization of men and societal attitudes loathed against men. Have not Boman and Sajid seen what happened with Adnan Sami, Madhur Bhandarkar or Raja Choudhary, or for that matter have not Sachin and Sehwag seen what happened with Manoj Prabhakar?

Well, for starters – Adnan Sami, Raja Choudhary, Manoj Prabhakar – all have been victims of false cases of dowry harassment/domestic violence and Madhur Bhandarkar faced charges of rape which the police could not establish and the court ordered re-investigation.

So when there were instances direct victimization of men around them, what made this foursome of Boman, Sachin, Sajid and Sehwag spew venom on men in public? I thought a lot about it and hence this open letter.

Through this open letter I am going to tell these*men the harm they have done to men in particular and the society in general.

Dear Foursome,

In India, celebrities have a phenomenal impact on social attitudes and in most places they are idol-worshipped. When Dr. Rajkumar – veteran Kannada film actor – died in Bangalore in **** April, there was widespread rampage in the city; the urban life was disrupted for*days. In the ensuing riots officially reported * people were killed and several others injured. While Dr. Rajkumar died a natural death following prolonged illness, such huge was the love for him from his fans that they just could not stop themselves and the riots were largely a result of efforts of the police to control the mob during the last visit to the actor’s body.

This incident shows the high level of influence celebrities have on the common people and their lives. People in India are ready to defy the Govt., the law and order system but they cannot go against what their favorite cricket or Bollywood star says which is in a way good as it tells us about the profound influence art and sports have on our lives. However, there is a flip side. Such high amount of reverence for these stars puts them at a very high humane pedestal and bestows a far greater amount of responsibility as well.

The sense of that responsibility is the key to the impact that these celebrities make on their fans, followers and revelers and sans that sense, large social damage can happen.

Now coming back to our*heroes (read “Protectors of Women”), I want to tell them that they might be thinking they have done a great job, “Contributing to women’s cause”, however, truth is far away from sight.

All you guys have done is to spread some more male-hatred by unnecessarily genderizing social issues like domestic violence. Whereas international studies by Prof. Murray Strauss have proved domestic violence is a gender-neutral issue and Indian women initiate * times more violence on men compared to what men can initiate on women,

However, gender obsessed feminists have always subjugated such reports and presented a completely wrong picture of the issue of “Domestic Violence”. By making the laws completely “wife-centric”, first of all no option has been left for anyone else in the family to even complain about domestic violence. Secondly by over-flooding the media with sob stories by women, feminists have effectively plugged the communication channel for men and it is evident by abnormally high suicide rates by men – especially married men.

Here’s the media report for the same – One married man commits suicide every * minutes.

And you guys have just added some more mud to the already plugged channel for men by telling loud and clear that men harass women. Quintessentially you have contributed directly to those men committing suicides – nothing less of a cold blooded murder in my opinion

I have personally counseled each of these men in the above link. And these men were ridiculed by the society when they opened up about the abuse they were undergoing. It is because sensation-savvy celebrities like you make statements without knowing the reality and create an anti-male atmosphere where genuine problems of men only find place in jokes, anecdotes and stand-up comedy shows on TV.

You are directly responsible for creating such an anti-male society which only believes in expecting from men and punishing them once the expectations are not met and not accepting them at all.

It may amuse you but it is a fact that men (including you) do not know that their ass is misplaced and is getting roasted somewhere. Men are victims of what I call as the “Misplaced Ass Syndrome”. For e.g. even though Sachin Tendulkar – the cricketing legend – talked against Indian husbands; there are many a husbands who aren’t unhappy that the Mumbai Indians lost in the IPL Final but are sad for Sachin!

Those husbands are probably not even aware that tomorrow if their wives go and file a case of domestic violence against them, the Protection Officer will say, “I know Indian husbands beat their wives black and blue, Sachin has said it and he has promised to be the Savior of such wives. I am a big fan of him and will go by his words blindly. So irrespective of your evidences you are guilty of committing domestic violence on your wife.”

And this precisely is a manifestation of the “Misplaced Ass Syndrome” – wherein even Sachin does not know that his one is misplaced as well. And the same holds good for the other*heroes – Boman, Sehwag and Sajid as well.

But I must quote Sajid here who said, “Every man cheats, let’s admit it.” I hope Sajid, your romantic taste is as healthy as mine; for I will have an affair with a woman only lest you have inclinations of having affairs with either a man or an alien. And in that case, are not the women equally responsible for breaking the relationship? Then why did you squarely blame men only? Was it for promoting your upcoming movie “Housefull”?

Anyways, I wrote this open letter to tell you that, “Aal Iz Not Well” when you blindly blame men merely because it sounds fashionable – men blaming men!.

But I am not surprised you did it because after all you*are also men and equal victims of “Misplaced Ass Syndrome”. For, it won’t take long before Boman becomes the next Madhur Bhandarkar or Sehwag becomes the next Manoj Prabhakar. I would sincerely pray it doesn’t happen as that would be a really hard way to replace your missing ass. Nonetheless I hope, after reading this letter you would be careful in future when you talk against men and with that I sign off. Adieu, ciao, tata, bye-bye, namashkar, saayo-nara.

I end this open letter with a last long article for you to go through – in case you would like to.

Is there anything good about men?